Do you have a Rav or Rebbetzin to speak to by yourself or that can guide you or refer you to someone qualified? ( the Rav should have experience with relationship issues and also does not have to be your personal Rav) After speaking to such a person you will then get your next steps.
It is impossible to analyze your plea for help without a face to face meeting from a knowledgeable person that could help you and your family with your crisis.
Going online with your question shows you still have doubt about your next step and indicates that you still have hope for your marriage.
Your spouse’s addiction and anger problems are probably symptomatic of something but not that your spouse is Chasvishalom a bad person or is upset with you.
There are many cases where initial failures occurred before a spouse was ready to realize counseling/help was needed.Eventually the spouse turned around was open to counseling and a remarkable change for the positive happened in the relationship. May Hashem guide you and give you much Bracha
P.S. I am sure there are certain triggers that you know of that might set your spouse off.Additionally, as much as in the RIGHT you think you may be I am sure talking about this topic or whatever topic that upsets you spouse is a trigger.
The following books are recommended by many therapists with positive outcomes.
Fight Less Love More (five minute conversations to change your relationship without blowing up or giving in)
Author Laurie Puhn JD
The book describes how to bring up stressful topics from mundane issues to major ones between spouses so as not to lead up to a fight. You can order it online.
B)To help your Shalom Bayis further especially before Chanuka: Unfortunately hurtful angry statements can leave an impression long after the words have been said. In a roundabout way you can roleplay by the Shabbos table by reading lessons out loud from the book Positive Word Power
(Building a better world with the words you speak) from Artscroll it is sold in most Seforim stores.
RE both books:You do NOT have to have Shalom Bayis issues to benefit from these books they can be helpful to everyone.