“Oomis, that’s the MO way, and look at the results. The path to a kosher solution is to do more research, more caution, more involvement of rabonim, shadchanim, mesadrei kiddushin, etc. No shidduch should be redt until the boy’s learning and conduct are known for sure, until the girl’s family is checked out beyond doubt (including how they go about kvod Shabbos), and until the prospective FIL proves to a beis din that he can provide support (in EY, a dira). If this sounds “fanatic,” we already behave this way when we shop for a washing machine… “
What results – people actually dating, getting to know each other, and getting married? Are you implying that girls who come from families that do not have kovod Shabbos, do not deserve to marry those wonderful boys whose learning and middos are known “for sure?” And what if there will be NO financial support, because the parents are tapped out and want their sons in law to earn a living as their OWN fathers did? Sorry, but your washing machine comment was not a proper analogy, either, IMO. What we are doing now is NOT working. Too many wonderful boys and girls are not meeting each other specifically because of the foolish and unnecessary criteria that you mentioned. Dayeinu.
(Thanks, Middle Path)