i was touched by the OP and wish ‘agreer’ much hatzlacha in life. however, i am surprised at all the opinions suggesting divorce. agreer does not indicate how long she is married, or when her feelings of discontent began. EVEN IF she went into the marriage “settling” the marriage is still min Hashamayim, still “meant to be”. marriages are often very rocky for the first several years. many newly married girls struggle with respecting their husbands (learning or working). many times after marriage, habits and character traits are revealed that turn one spouse off completely to the other. i’m not saying that one should stay in a miserable marriage, but if a person doesn’t solve the core of the problem and opts to give up and get out (ie, divorce) they may find themselves in the same situation again, in the next marriage.
despite 2011 culture, lasting love and respect don’t happen spontaneously. we don’t fall in love, and naturally respect all the different habits of those we live with. it takes so much tears and work. Agreer, your OP is heartbreaking. i hope you are able to get help for yourself and for your marriage.