Momma, sometimes when you help others Hashem shines brocha on you. Maybe you can stop focusing on everything that is wrong and start doing whatever is right for you. B”H you have a child. What do YOU need to do for yourself to be Happy. HOW do YOU need to be respected? Think about that and don’t accept unacceptable behavior. Do you want to lose weight? Will that make you happy? If the answer is YES, then do it for yourself and not for your husband. Are you staying heavy to get even with your husband because you are angry at him or do you really not care about yourself and your health? Separate your feelings from your husband’s feelings. Lets put him to the side. Who are YOU and what do YOU want for yourself?
You have been terribly hurt and you carry a lot of baggage and a lot of pain. Are you willing to let go of it? The more you relive the baggage and the past the more you relive the pain. So where do you want to go from here? Do you want to stay trapped in that cycle or do you want to make better choices for yourself? Are YOU important? Do you realize that YOU ARE important? Do you realize that YOU COUNT? Do you realize that YOU ARE ENTITLED and YOU DO DESERVE to be happy and have a good life?
If you are prepared to love yourself and accept the fact that you count, are entitled to a better life and deserve to be happy then there are things you can do to achieve that. Hashem will send you the shelichim to help you. But if you want to sit in your misery and just accept your lot in life and do nothing about it Hashem is not going to do much. Hashem helps those who help themselves. Comparing yourself to others and wishing you had their life will not help you. Comparing yourself to others and saying to yourself “I deserve to be happy just like all those other people, will help you change things.”
So Momma how can I help you, what kind of support do you need?