Tzippi: I would like to ask a question. How many couples have you set up and gotten to a fifth date in the last year. Thougt so!
Sure some go easy, like when you call the plumber and he fixes the problem in 5 minutes and bills you $100. The vast majority take much time and effort. We aren’t even talking minimum wage here!
How many shidduchim break off because the girl will have to send a outfit to the cleaenrs for the third date, or the boy will have to rent a car? why when we talk about JUST compensation do we start getting all protective. Might it be that we have a very very skewed look on what shadchanim do for our children???
GAW: I didn’t say it’s a communal obligation. Its a individuals obligation like their plumber and gardener. Who pays for the girls clothes? who pays for the boys tolls? Why suddenly when we are talking about fair compensation for time and effort are we suddenly so poor.
How many shuls are there? how many shadchanim for hire are there? it doesn’t work. We need to mobilize the forces at large. Any community where the parents start paying the shadchanim for having successfully set up # dates will see a BOON in the number of shidducim redd.
Its NOT just about the $$ although that certainly is nice. Its very clear that when people pay for something they appreciate it more and shadchanim (professionals and non-professionals) will cater to those who don’t step all over them.