Dr. Respler is a respected therapist and very fine woman, but her advice comes from a specific hashkafa, which is not necessarily the best advice for a particular situation. If memory serves me, I believe that her attitude about litvishe people dating in a more chassidishe way was a response to someone who was litvishe and wanted to date a chassidishe boy because she couldn’t find any litvishe boys that she liked enough to date. In any case, if I am mistaken about that, just because a columnist gives advice, does not mean that advice is ALWAYS correct for everyone. I stand by my original belief, that it takes time to get to know someone reasonably well, and a few dates don’t cut it (with due respect to InShidduchim, who clearly was most fortunate, B”H).
