I would worry more about all the ways that real estate owners manage to get deductions to lower their income. And other businessman that have their businesses pay for many of their expenses so their income looks lower and yes many of them get scholarships.
Let us let our rebbeim live!! They work so hard with no perks.
I hear you point and I would want the schools to focus more on the families that spend above their income limit and ask for scholarships. And yes above the standard (read simple) bar mitzvah, takana wedding, clothing, trips etc and then ask for lower tuition.